So this is the most personal blog I have done so far. It is about a situation that I have been going through recently and has been really hard on me. You see I met my best friend on Kylexy.net three years ago. We got to be really close and talked every night by instant messaging on the computer. We are both really shy and dont really like talking on the phone. Anyway, recently I got and email from him telling me his computer broke and he was trying to get it fixed. Five days later he emailed me agian from a friend's computer telling me he missed me, was thinking about me, and his friend was trying to fix his computer and hopefully we would talk soon. And that was it. Four months later I have not heard from him again. I feel horrible. So many emotions. Sad, worried that something happened to him, scared that maybe he simply forgot about me and I will never hear from him again. Everytime I look at the pictures of him he gave me and the beautiful gifts he gave me for my birthday and Christmas I wonder what I will do with them all if I have lost him forever. I feel heartbroken. I also feel angry that this whole thing had to happen and frusterated that it isn't over and that my prayers don't seem to get answered. One day when I was feeling really bad, I decided to watch my favorite episode of Kyle XY which I have said before is The Prophet. It got to the part where Nichole is talking to her pyschologist and she talks about how she misses Kyle and how she feels like she lost one of her own children. She also talks about all of the emotions she is feeling. Many things she said were exactly how I have been feeling. It made me feel like maybe I am not wierd for feeling the way that I do. Then when I watched my favorite scene where Kyle comes home to the Tragers and they are all hugging and so happy, just for a moment I have a little hope that my friend will come back to me. I still cry when I'm alone in my room. I still feel bad at times. Really bad. But I take comfort in the inspiration that watching Kyle XY gives me, the joy I feel when I work on this site, and the support my wonderful friends on twitter and facebook have given me with it. I always think of the saying, "When God closes a door, he opens a window." I guess creating this site is my "window" and all of my friends and Kyle XY the one door I know will always be open when I need a little comfort.
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